Monday, October 22, 2012

A God Moment

Throughout Noah's life and in the years since his death, there are many moments that I can point to when I tangibly felt the love of God.  These 'God moments' have become an integral part of our story and are the reason I believe my faith is intact.

In some ways, I consider Eli's entire life as a 'God moment'.  He has brought us immeasurable joy that eases the ache of grief in our hearts.

But yesterday stands out.

We were in Tuscaloosa for the Georgia volleyball match against Alabama.  Eli and I tagged along with the team to see friends and visit our old stomping grounds.  (And watch Georgia sweep Alabama in an awesome match!)

Josh and I took Eli to the cemetery to visit Noah's grave.  It had been a year since we had been there last.

Josh told Eli that we were going to visit Noah, so when we got out of the car he began looking for Noah.  

"Daddy, where is Noah?  I don't see Noah.  Where is he?"

His little toddler brain hasn't quite comprehended his brother's story yet.

I started choking up immediately because Eli has never really said Noah's name before.  There is something about hearing him say his brother's name that melted my heart.

We showed him the marker stone but he quickly became distracted by the flowers and decorations around some of the other graves in the children's garden.

Josh called him back over and asked for him to pray for us.  Eli's standard prayer goes something like this:  
'Thank you Jesus who lives in our hearts and loves us and loves us amen.'  

Yesterday, though, he threw us a curve ball.

His prayer started the same way as usual.  His little voice was steady:
Thank you Jesus who lives in our hearts...

But then he started to sing.
He started to sing a song I had never taught him or heard him sing before.
He sang:
God our Father, God our Father
we give thanks, we give thanks

I don't even really know how he ended the prayer because I was too overwhelmed by the moment.

God had used our sweet, energetic soon-to-be three year old to remind us once again that He loves us.  That He was there with us at Noah's grave.  That He had blessed us more than we could have ever asked for or imagined.

For the record, I think Eli learned that song in his class at Community Bible Study. And I will give each of his teachers a big hug on Thursday morning for that gift.